LOVINGS IN CINCINNATI

Thesis thesis thesis

2012-02-15T13:55:00.000-05:00

Just one chapter left to revise, then write the intro and conclusion. Then little things like format the bibliography, write an abstract, and fix the page numbers in the table of contents. The deadline's March 1st. Think I can do it? Wish me luck!

The newspaper of my head

2012-02-12T22:41:00.002-05:00

World/U.S.: Huffington post article about a child's response to antisemitism in Manhattan. Absolutely lovely, if an article on that subject can be referred to that way.

Health: Teeth-brushing issue solved! We bought Xander a new pink toothbrush and that did the trick. Also, Ari can now crawl up the stairs. He's lightening fast. We broke out the baby gates last night and the poor thing was so confused.

Arts: Xander, the excavator Potter, and the pink "music truck" (because it plays a tune when you open the door) all have conversations now. Xander uses his normal voice to be himself, Potter's voice is squeaky and high-pitched, and the pink music truck is extra low. It's utterly adorable, I'll have to try and videotape it when he's not looking.

Book/movie: We all watched Mary Poppins tonight and had a grand time. I hadn't seen it since I was a child, and I'd never realized how much it had for adults! The kids' mother was a suffragette, Dick van Dyke's character was a commentary on class relations at the time, etc. I mean, it wasn't quite Upstairs, Downstairs, but it wasn't solely the magical realism kids' movie I remembered, either. Also, Cleopatra's Daughter by Michelle Moran? A completely engrossing, fun escape into the worlds of ancient Rome and Egypt.

Education: Oy this is true. Just fill in "rabbinical school" instead of "grad school."

Real estate: We showed our house yesterday when it was a complete and utter mess, and we were here, in our pajamas. Why? Because we never got the message that the realtor was coming by until after she already left.

Dining and wine: Jonathan made Indian curry last night and it was fantastic, hooray!

Obituaries: W. Gunther Plaut, who wrote "The Torah: A Modern Commentary" and helped shape Reform Judaism. And on a less serious note, an unknown number of "bad guys" in our house, deceased for reasons of non-violence. They entered Xander's room and threatened him. He brought out his imaginary tank with missiles and guns to shoot them. I intervened and asked if we could peaceably resolve the situation. Why were they bad guys? Because they were sad. Why were they sad? Because they were hungry. How could we solve our problem? By feeding them. What did they want? Candy. Cherry lollipops, to be precise. So we offered one lollipop to each of them, and the "bad guys" became "happy guys." Whew.

Travel: The last of the Sacramento pictures.

Lois and Mike's house in the background.

Facing away from the house.

A little dubious about the roller.

Better once his cousin's with him.

Milkshake moustache.

Playground joy.

And in the end, a passed-out child.

NEWS

2012-02-09T23:09:00.001-05:00

So everyone at HUC tells me that once I send back the official letter of intent I'm good to share with the world, I don't need to wait til the contract's signed. I believe them, so...

I am utterly, completely thrilled to announce that as of July 1st, I will have the honor of serving as the new rabbinic educator at Congregation B'nai Israel in Sacramento, California! Jonathan and I couldn't be happier. We're joining a fantastic community, will be living close to family, and are returning home to Cali!

To say that we're excited would be a bit of an understatement. :)

Of course, the position is contingent upon ordination. That means that in four months I have a thesis to complete, classes to finish, an internship to continue, a house to pack and move, and kids to ready for the upcoming life change. It's gonna be a jam-packed spring.

I can't wait!

We're back!

2012-02-08T15:35:00.000-05:00

So, me saying not to listen to me, that I was going to post on our trip? That was before I got to Sacramento and Portland and had days scheduled from 8:30am to 10:30pm. I never even turned on the computer!

Of course I can't comment on any of the placement process or visits in such a public forum, but suffice it to say that the past two weeks taught me a lot about myself, the kind of rabbi I want to be, and what I truly value in a congregation. In a week or two (once the paperwork goes through) I'll be able to post more concrete news about our future.

However, there is one thing I can write about right now - FAMILY! We stayed with Aunt Lois and Uncle Mike for the majority of our trip, and it was incredible. First, their house defies description. They built it themselves, drywall piece by bathroom tile. It's huge, and tailored to their every need and want. Plus, it's on a mountain, in the foothills of the Sierra Nevadas, and the views are amazing from every window. Here is but a taste:

Moonlight during a sunset.

Sunrise. (I was awake to see one!!)

Second, we saw so many people! My mom came up to watch Xander while Jonathan and I were in interviews for one weekend. Then she went home and Xander stayed with Lois and Mike while we headed off for the next leg of our journey. Being on a plane without Xander felt so strange, like I had forgotten my wallet... I kept thinking that something was missing. He had an amazing time though, and barely thought about us at all.

In Portland we saw my cousin Francine, who we haven't gotten together with in years. And returning to Sacramento, we had a real vacation as a family for a few days. On Saturday we had a mini-reunion with Tante Edna and Uncle John, Liz, and Dorothy and John, and shared stories and photo albums over fresh produce and yummy delicious cake (happy early birthday, Lois!). A definite food highlight for me was Lois' sinfully fabulous fruit dip, consisting of cream cheese, marshmallow creme, and vanilla. I refused to memorize the exact recipe otherwise I'd be eating it all the time!

Oh yes, and I must tell of the cousin-bonding! Xander's second cousin John is only a few months older than Xander, and they both share a love of excavators, dump trucks, and all things construction. John is potty trained, and showed Xander his ultimate joy this trip: peeing in the dirt outside. I'd feel badly posting those pictures (although omg they're hilarious), but here's this one instead:

Jonathan at the bottom of the puppy pile.

Sharing an "Old McDonald's" milkshake.

Funny faces at bathtime.

I think there are some more pictures of them on the backhoe and other equipment, during a visit to a neighbor's house with Mike, but I'll have to track those down.

As much as I love vacations, I do like coming back to home sweet home. Thank you thank you to Rachael and Danyul for keeping our cats well-fed and loved during our time away, and now it's off to unpack!

Okay, I lied.

2012-01-24T16:14:00.000-05:00

Don't believe me anymore when I say I won't post. Apparently I'm addicted. It's kind of relaxing.

So two interesting things:

First, I'm distracting myself from job hunt nervousness with movies and TV episodes with my sister. We're almost through the first season of Weeds, and I'm really liking Lie to Me. Even better than that from an academic and sociocultural perspective was the documentary Trembling Before God, about gay and lesbian Orthodox Jews. And Arranged, about a devout Orthodox Jewish woman facing an arranged marriage who becomes friends with a strictly religious Muslim woman in the same predicament. And because I liked the actors in the last one, I watched Breaking Upwards, which was a thoughtful romantic drama about love gone bad.

Second, it is easily apparent that Xander has the theatre bug in him. While "playing pretend" the other night, scooping up pretend dirt and snow, Jonathan tossed a pretend snowball at him. Xander looked in horror at his chest, which had nothing on it but pretend snow... and burst into tears. Jonathan had to brush the pretend snow off his face and shoulders to quell his sobs, and all the while my sister nearly choked on her laughter. My eldest son cracks me up.

Here he is with his friend Andrew at a playdate the day before yesterday:

"Hiding" behind the table so that I couldn't find Xander to go home

And the non-blurry version. Is he not the king of facial expressions?

Yay for sisterly visits!

2012-01-22T02:33:00.002-05:00

Odelia spent 18 hours on a train to be here with us for the week. And she crawls in the play structures with Xander with no complaint. I'm feelin' the love.

Between her visit, preparing for our upcoming placement travel, and dealing with the pesky colds that won't go away, it's going to be a very busy household the next two weeks.

Brace yourself: There will most likely be no pictures for a while. Be prepared for short, infrequent updates.

I promise you though, the kids won't grow that much.

"I am Jewish" by Andrew Lustig

2012-01-17T21:30:00.000-05:00

This video has been making the rounds online; I love it.

I also love that it was made at BCI in Simi Valley. Yay home!

Even if the winter's mild, viruses still run rampant.

2012-01-17T17:33:00.000-05:00

In the past three days, Xander has come down with the stomach flu and Ari was diagnosed with ear and sinus infections. Tell me oh blog readers, why do kids get sick everywhere? We have a perfectly functioning bathroom that they never reach. Thank goodness we have lots of laundry detergent.

Before our house was hit with the plague, though, we took some pictures:

Ari can't reach any of the windows while standing up, but loves to look out the front door.

He's such a peaceful kid.

For size comparison. Xander wanted the record to show that Potter is almost as tall as Ari.

Winter bunnies. We just came back from a walk (blanket around Ari's legs not pictured). Brrr!

In response to a very messy dinner

2012-01-15T21:34:00.000-05:00

We had nachos for dinner tonight: roasted garlic and black bean chips, refried beans, and cheese. The ultimate in napkin-needing.

After dinner, wiping up Xander's fingers that were surprisingly nacho-free, I told him, "I love how you always like to stay clean, Xander. You did a really great job, thank you."

Jonathan added, with pride, "That's my boy!"

Xander's response? A hearty nod toward Jonathan and a completely sincere, "That's my grown-up!"

Winter has arrived.

2012-01-13T09:47:00.000-05:00

19°F

Feels Like: 4°

If you give a mom a muffin

2012-01-11T22:39:00.002-05:00

Attributed to someone named Kathy Fictorie, as found in my Facebook feed:

"If you give a mom a muffin, she'll want a cup of coffee to go with it. She'll pour herself some. Her three-year-old will spill the coffee. She'll wipe it up. Wiping the floor, she will find dirty socks. She'll remember she has to do laundry. When she puts the laundry in the washer, she'll trip over boots and bump into the freezer. Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan supper. She will get out a pound of hamburger. She'll look for her cookbook (101 Things To Make With A Pound Of Hamburger.) The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail. She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow. She will look for her checkbook. The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two-year-old. She'll smell something funny. She'll change the two-year-old. While she is changing the two-year-old the phone will ring. Her five-year-old will answer and hang up. She'll remember that she wants to phone a friend to come for coffee. Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup. She will pour herself some. And chances are, if she has a cup of coffee, her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it."

Placement monsters... oh wait, placement AND monsters!

2012-01-10T22:35:00.000-05:00

Placement was fantastic. I did my best to share who I was with everyone I met, and everyone I met was absolutely wonderful - seeing all these rabbis, lay leaders and soon-to-be-rabbis left me feeling excited and revitalized about the state of Reform Judaism in the United States. It may sound corny, but truly, that was how I felt. I was one of the lucky ones who didn't have any interviews on Tuesday, but I came to campus anyway with Ari to offer moral support and baby therapy to friends who did.

The other major thing in my life right now aside from placement is monsters. Xander sees them all the time in his room. Tonight was a first though - when I told the monsters, on Xander's instructions, that they needed to go away so he could be safe, this time they didn't disappear: "They're still here!! They didn't go downstairs!! They're not being good listeners, Mommy." So I counted down from five to one. But according to Xander, those pesky monsters still didn't go away!

I was forced, then, to put the monsters on time-out. Picture me bending down into empty air, "wrestling" with the invisible monsters who were trying to run away, then carrying them to the corner and having major discussions with them about how it's not nice to scare people, and that they were going to stay in the corner for three minutes to think about what they did.

Xander took it all very seriously, and commented after a minute that the monsters were thinking about what they did and that it was time to take them off of time-out. After confirming this with the monsters and telling them that their time was up, I asked if they wanted a hug. Xander said yes, they did, so I crouched into the corner and gave myself a deep hug, telling the monsters how proud I was of them for listening and deciding to make a good choice in not scaring Xander anymore. At this point Xander decided he wanted to hug the monsters too, so he joined me in the corner and wrapped his own arms around himself.

After the hugs were over, we went back into his bedroom. And lo and behold, Xander proclaimed that the monsters were now nice monsters! He told me that they had gone downstairs, but that since they were nice, they could stay if they wanted to.

Crisis averted!

Upcoming blog hiatus

2012-01-05T23:49:00.001-05:00

Rebecca R. from the HUC-LA campus is here staying with us before placement, so it must be real! Tomorrow and Saturday are crazy, then Sunday and Monday are interviews, and Tuesday is schmoozing with people still in the area. I'll probably be offline until late next week.

I truly do have faith that I'll end up where I'm supposed to be. But just in case... it can't hurt for you to cross your fingers for me anyway. :)

The emotional wringer

2012-01-04T02:06:00.000-05:00

You know that old adage that the decision to have children is the decision to have your heart forever walk about outside your body?

Jonathan and I spent the better part of tonight at Cincinnati Children's Hospital with Ari. He had eaten a small foil star, part of a Hanukkah decoration, that had fallen on the floor when we weren't looking. His reaction was textbook: bouts of vomiting, choking, gagging, crying, etc. God bless Maura and Liad, who raced over immediately to take care of Xander so Jonathan and I could go to the ER together. After a few hours the doctors were able to fish the "offending foreign body" out of his throat and the X-rays showed that all was clear. But it was scary. I am so grateful that he's okay, and for the kind and caring nurses, doctors, and technicians who helped bring my baby back to health.

And to think that I'd been worried about rabbinic placement. Nothing like a night in the hospital to put one's priorities in perspective.

New Year's stats

2012-01-03T10:36:00.000-05:00

Xander, 3 years 3 months: 30.4 lbs
Ari, 9 months: 20.2 lbs
Simcha, 8 year old tabby: 19.6 lbs

What is wrong with this picture?

Ari the virtuoso

2012-01-01T22:46:00.000-05:00

Happy new year, everyone! In an effort to get a clean start to the year, I cleaned off the video camera of all the old files. Apparently I hadn't emptied it since before the High Holidays. Oops!

So for fun, here are the oldest and newest Ari videos. The first is really long, so I'm not expecting anyone but my mother and grandmother to watch the whole thing. In it he squawks like a pterodactyl and I make funny animal noises:

The second is from last week. Ari was actively hitting the keys and "singing" right before Jonathan took the video, and then of course stopped when we hit play. And poor kiddo, his little noggin has gotten quite a lot of bruises from standing up holding onto the piano, and then falling over. Note I try to help him avoid that at the end. No matter how hard he tries, he just can't seem to do a successful split...

Construction, friendship, and 3 year old discussions

2011-12-31T23:03:00.002-05:00

For the past five months or so, Jonathan and I have been passing a construction site when we take Xander to and from school. They're building a McDonald's with an indoor play structure, and Xander has been amazed at watching the progress of the building from literally a dirt pile teeming with excavators to a "new Old McDonald's," as he calls it. Its grand opening was yesterday, so of course we went for dinner.

I love my husband because if it was just me, I would have ordered food, watched Xander play, and gone home. But not Jonathan. He struck up a conversation with a stranger in a suit who turned out to be the owner, who then sat and joined us for 20 minutes, even giving Xander free ice cream. This guy is the ultimate American success story: he started off at 16 years old working the cash register at his local Golden Arches, and now fifty years later is a vice-president and owns 10 franchises, including every single McDonald's in Cincinnati. Apparently his father-in-law, to his dying day, made fun of him and asked him if he was still flipping burgers for a living.

After the owner left to talk to some other suits, Jonathan approached another couple in the play area with kids around the same age as ours. We ended up chatting for over an hour! The people are awesome, and we exchanged cell phone info at the end. My favorite part was when their daughter asked Xander to come play on the big slide with her, and he said, "No, I'm going with Mommy. [motions me over to introduce me to her] This is my parent, Mommy!"

Xander was full of deep thoughts on the way home, but was so excited he was easily derailed by whatever he saw out the window. To wit: "Mommy, I have to tell you something! Some babies have teeth and some don't. [pause] Lookit, a cement mixer!"

What else what else... oh yes, do you recall at one point I had written on this blog that when I was a kid, I was tired of long-winded explanations? I had asked my mom to tell me something, but just "please don't explain it!" [I remember the exact quote because it was often repeated in stories later on in life.] Well, it's definitely coming back to me now: At dinner tonight I was talking normally with Xander about his day. Or so I thought. I asked him about the most interesting part of his day (gymnastics in the muscle room, the gross motor area), which gymnastics he liked best (somersaults), what art he did (painting), and who he played with (Lior, who has a big monster at home but chose not bring him to school). I was just about to ask about Lior's monster when Xander looks up at me from his chair, quesedilla slice in hand, sighed, and said exasperatedly like a teenager, "Mommy, no more questions. I'm eating." Jonathan about bust a gut laughing.

Oh yes, and last funny tidbit of the evening: I'm doing research on congregations to prepare for my upcoming interviews. I'm also trying to arrange funding so that I can attend this awesome conference in Philadelphia in May, on the history of the Jewish book. My mind is apparently all one track, however, because I just noticed that instead of bookmarking the conference page "Lehmann workshop," I labeled it "Lehmann worship."

And now off to our New Year's party at Tim's. The plan is to be home by nine, put the kids to bed, then watch a movie!

Another article that makes me think

2011-12-31T13:35:00.004-05:00

Jewish Day Care is Missing Link: Young Parents Would Find Community at Creche

So, so true. I have no idea how to change this on an institutional scale, but the person who does gets my vote as URJ president.

Have to share

2011-12-30T21:29:00.001-05:00

I'll write a real post later, but in the meantime, read this article. From The Huffington Post, on gender discrimination found in the most unexpected ways: The Penis Mom. I have no idea who this woman is, but I think I love her. As Jonathan said when he read it, "This is an awesome article. And I'm so the husband."

Hanukkah, the end

2011-12-29T12:50:00.000-05:00

First, pictures as promised of the presents Xander made Jonathan and myself:

The menorah he created for Jonathan. It was a three-day project, which is huge for his age. We painted one side, let it dry, painted the other side the next day, and then put it together the third day.

Second side. This one had lots of red and black because those are Jonathan's favorite colors.

Sand art he made as a surprise for me. Blue is my favorite color. Pink is his. Voila!

Presents from school: a homemade menorah and the star card that came with it.

Back of the card.

And Jonathan, for the last night of Hanukkah, gave me the BEST PRESENT EVER. Maybe only my grandmother will appreciate it, but I literally did a happy dance when I opened up the wrapping:

My favorite book in the world, analyzed to a tee. As the Amazon review says,

"Now Leonard Marcus, a nationally acclaimed writer on children's literature, has created a richly annotated edition of this perennial favorite. Marcus's expansive annotations include interviews with the author and illustrator, illuminating excerpts from Juster's notes and drafts, cultural and literary commentary, and Marcus's own insights on the book. The Annotated Phantom Tollbooth also includes an introduction that shares the fascinating background on the book's publication—Juster and Feiffer met as young neighbors in Brooklyn, New York, and thus began a fortuitious collaboration on a project that would become an instant classic—as well as its enduring place in the world of children's literature."

Yippee! Oh, and thanks to mom for the gift of clothes... Rachael and I went on a shopping spree yesterday and I'm all outfitted for winter. It can officially snow now, I'm prepared.

Back to placement preparation...

1st night of Hanukkah... and other pictures

2011-12-27T14:07:00.000-05:00

Excitedly wearing Daddy's shoes

Chilling with a book.

Crawling in my office.

Almost there...

And... STANDING!

So proud of himself afterward.

The next night, the first thing we did was light the electric menorah in the window.

Spinning dreidels.

They light up!

Helping Ari open his gift.

They actually worked really well together.

This baby wears his heart on his sleeve.

Jackets from Mom.

All jazzed about Buzz, Woody, and the DINOSAUR!

Ari's a bit overwhelmed by wrapping paper.

I'm laughing at Xander's sounds of unabashed glee.

The excavator known as "Potter."

Getting down deep.

Examining the treads.

A very happy kidlet.

And, sadly, that's all the Hanukkah pictures. We haven't felt very inspired the rest of the week. (I imagine that's an easy part about Christmas, judging from all my friends' Facebook photos - you just get out the camera once and you're done with it!) Other major present hits for Xander have been a laser star show for his ceiling, a construction puzzle from Bubby, and remote control bumper cars. Personally I'm loving my books and a movie, Ari adores his shape sorter, and Jonathan went gaga for a collection of lion documentaries (from my mother, not me. Because she gives better gifts than I do. Sigh). We also thought it was important for Xander to make us gifts, to know that it doesn't just go one way, so Jonathan and I both worked with him separately to create something for the other. I'll take pictures of those later.

Just one night left to go! Thank goodness, because I'm reaching my latke limit...

The perfect Hanukkah present: a true escape

2011-12-26T23:14:00.001-05:00

Books! Jonathan got me so many books! I took a break last night and today from thesis/placement prep and read Inheritance by Christopher Paolini, the last book in the Eragon series. It was so much better than the last one, I can't tell you. But reading it so soon after A Dance with Dragons, the fourth book in A Song of Ice and Fire by George R.R. Martin, really highlighted how youthful the former series is compared to the latter. Both have battle scenes in them, but the Eragon books are made for kids; no sex, no politics, no love, just black and white protagonists and villains. (The series also strongly resemble Lord of the Rings and Star Wars, but then lots of reviewers have pointed that out. That said, they're still fun to read.) Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire, however, is complicated, nuanced, and completely gray... which makes the characters fascinating and their actions that much more appealing.

The authors of both series, however, DO make up completely different worlds, which I admire. It is in their honor that I post this map.

Westeros, the setting of A Song of Ice and Fire, made it in, of course. Noticeably missing, however, is Alagaesia, the setting of the Inheritance Cycle. And then also Cittagazze, the main city in the His Dark Materials series (of which The Golden Compass was the first), but that's neither here nor there. I love that a corner island is "Where the Wild Things Are" and that they have Sodor, where Thomas the Train lives, and then Florin, of The Princess Bride fame, at the bottom. I guess Hogwarts didn't make it because it's technically still in the real world of Scotland.

All hail escapes. Whether books or video games, somehow it's all equally immersive.

Edited to add: Thanks to Lynn K., I just added The Dictionary of Imaginary Places to my Amazon wishlist. What a fun-looking book!

Hanukkah party from last weekend

2011-12-23T22:38:00.000-05:00

Our agenda was simple: survive Hanukkah with five 3-year old boys.

First, pre-party, there was baking. Jonathan whipped up a platter of Russian tea cake cookies (also known as snowdrops). As everyone arrived, they were served sufganyot with strawberry jelly. I told them the Hanukkah story as they were finishing.

After hand-washing, we "practiced" that it was the eighth night of Hanukkah by lighting the candles. (The silver circular thing is the train tracks to the Hogwarts Express. After the boys saw it in the beginning it got moved so as to avoid breakage.)

Our little pyros.

Singing the blessings.

Mesmerized by fire.

I asked everyone to sit on the floor in preparation of dreidel, and Jonathan went back into the kitchen (all the pictures from here on out were taken by Amanda, Brian's mom.) Xander spontaneously showed everyone his electric menorah which plays the tune to Maoz Tzur. Thank goodness I pulled out all my songsheets from last year, because no one (including me) knew all the words, in Hebrew or English.

A quiet moment.

Handing out gelt in anticipation of dreidel.

Ari needed gelt too.

This is a very serious game.

Spinning requires intense focus.

Their captive audience.

Explaining why he needed more gelt, no doubt.

Someone must have got gimel, take all!

Eden's a fan.

Brian and Andrew love chocolate, too.

Yasha has the menorah!

Everyone took turns holding the chanukiyah until it became a fight, when all of a sudden it became Ari's turn. Ari then put it in another room. What a smart baby!

Cracking themselves up.

After dreidel came storytime.

Listening from Yael's lap.

I love reading books to kids this age. They get so into it.

Listening intently. The tale of the Maccabees is suspenseful!

Moving into the kitchen for latkes with applesauce and sour cream.

We had prepared sugar cookies for decorating, but the kids' attention span had run low, so I figured the planned content part of the afternoon was over. Commence playtime! AKA running around in circles with musical instruments. They wanted to form a band, and that they did. Oy our house was loud.

Don't let the picture fool you. They barely paused once.

Completing the running circle.

Playing flute in the ball tent.

Different angle of the band.

Right about to climb through the tunnel.

The kids played, the adults talked, and three hours after everyone arrived, we had the place back to ourselves. Xander cried because he didn't want his friends to leave while Jonathan and I plopped on the couch, exhausted. The house was an utter WRECK. But everyone had a really good time, and that's what counts.

He speaks!

2011-12-23T11:47:00.001-05:00

Ari's now said "mama" a few times, with purpose!

Oh yes... and someone at school asked while holding him, "Does he smell like powdered sugar, or is it just me?"

Guess the family member

2011-12-22T19:38:00.001-05:00

WHO......

- went from army crawling, to crawling on his hands and knees, to full-on pulling himself up and playing the kid piano, in a matter of two weeks?

- argued with Dell for an hour to fix something for my computer, and ended up getting the parts shipped to us overnight for free?

- didn't bite their nails for two whole months and got a really nice manicure for the first time in six years?

- got a large excavator with working treads for Hanukkah, and has since named the excavator "Potter" and insists Potter sleep with him every night?

- is addicted to spending time with his brother and follows him all over the house as fast as he can, causing no end of headaches for the rest of the family?

- insisted we call Odelia on the phone "on speaker" to ask her how to say words like "house," "windshield wipers," "cat," "black," "street sign," "magic wand," and "garage" in Hebrew?

- has perfected the family sufganyot recipe, to the demise of the diet of the other adult in the house?

- smiles and laughs every time we sing the Hanukkah blessings and is mesmerized by the fire?

- was diagnosed with an ear infection plus a sinus infection, and is now on antibiotics? The friend's mom of this person emailed to say that she apologizes, her son was probably Patient Zero as she's now sick too.

- spent the day clothes shopping with a friend and got a fancy new suit in a lovely pre-pregnancy size?

- loves to light the electric menorah and sing along in nonsense words to the tune of Maoz Tzur? And made his mom's day when we were listening to music and he asked to dance the hora?

- slept for TWELVE hours last night and only got up to nurse ONCE?

Ahh, the mysteries I leave you with...

My definition of happiness

2011-12-20T01:40:00.000-05:00

Finishing the third chapter of my thesis.

A fantastic yummy dinner that I didn't make.

Children who went to bed when they were supposed to with no complaints.

Having a "wrapping paper party" with my husband as we prepared for the first night of Hanukkah tomorrow.

Latkes with applesauce and sour cream BOTH.

Notting Hill and schmoopiness.

Chai tea and homemade sugar cookies.

Mmmmm....

What I've been doing the past few days

2011-12-15T21:31:00.000-05:00

1) Thesis work. I'm on page 15 of Chapter Three.

2) Taste-testing all of Jonathan's baking. He's been quite busy perfecting his sufganyot. Last night at 11:30pm he came in with a new batch of cookies. When I protested that it was too late to eat cookies, he held them out in front of me and I acquiesced. (He really twisted my arm, he let me smell them!) We ended up in front of the TV. "Some husbands lure their wives into late-night partying and drugs," he said. "I lure you into sugar cookies and late-night episodes of West Wing."

3) Playing with my kids. This morning Jonathan landed on the bottom of the puppy pile as Ari tried to climb on top of him and Xander nearly smushed him. I was wedged halfway between the bed and the floor, but as Jonathan stroked my hair, I slowly sank down further and further. Xander couldn't see me momentarily and got confused. "Where's Mommy?" he asked. I said nothing, enjoying the cuddles. "She melted," said Jonathan. "Don't melt, Mommy!!!" proclaimed my son. "Turn back into ice!!"

4) Translating Hebrew words. Xander's been on a "What's this in Hebrew?" kick. Of course, Murphy's law, he only seems to ask for words that I don't know. For example: I have no idea what "excavator" is in Hebrew. Before he turned two I barely knew what it was in English! (Though note in case anyone is interested, I do know that dachpoor means bulldozer. I'm thinking excavator is machpoor, but I'm not certain.) I also had no idea what Kleenex was in Hebrew, and I told Xander that we always just called it... wait for it... Kleenex! Xander thought that was hilarious. Thanks to my sister, he now knows that it's technically mimhatot af.

5) Hanukkah prep. This involves digging out all the songsheets we have in preparation for our kid party on Saturday (for all the parents, obviously the kids can't read yet), making a plan of attack on cleaning the house and going grocery shopping for fixings.

In the spirit of the holiday, I'll end on a song-ful note, courtesy of Sylvan. Enjoy!

The (Non-Hanukkah) Festival of Lights

2011-12-14T13:09:00.000-05:00

Entry to zoo.

At the beginning, when he still wanted to walk.

The train rushing over the lit-up lake.

The lake lights kept changing color!

More lake lights.

And yet another variation.

Giraffes are so tall!

Waiting to see the train go by.

Xander is in the middle, Devin is to the right. The puppets were voiced by real people who talked to the kids, like "hi you with blond curls, come closer!"

Smiling smiling smiling.

Watching the lights from the train this time. (Trains are very important in our lives, you may have noticed.)

So, so happy to finally be on the train. It was over an hour wait, but both boys insisted.

Meanwhile, back at the house....

Because we haven't had too many kitty pictures lately.

Close-up of love. Sometimes I think they snuggle more than the humans in the house.

And last but not least, Ari and his mashed potatoes.

Redefining success

2011-12-12T17:34:00.000-05:00

I had great plans for the day. I was going to log serious hours working on my thesis, and in my "free" time pay bills and do errands.

Instead, I never made it my home office. I took care of a sick baby who wanted me way more than Jonathan.

In one sense my day was a waste. I did nothing I had intended to do. (Like, literally, nothing.)

In another sense the baby is happy and giggling. So maybe it was a successful, productive day after all.

Sitting at home with a sick baby

2011-12-11T22:44:00.001-05:00

Poor Ari is NOT feeling well... it's either bad teething or an ear infection, I'm not sure (the doctor's appt tomorrow will tell us for certain). Either way, I'm home with him while Jonathan went to our scheduled playdate with Devin's family to the Festival of Lights at the zoo.

BUT... this means I can write a quick blog entry.

[Hahaha okay it's now five hours later. A crying baby needed my attention more than the computer.]

Xander and Jonathan are back, and except for being cold, they had a fabulous time. Jonathan took tons of pictures which will be posted later.

But what was I going to write, you ask?

- Jonathan's photography gig on Thursday went wonderfully. He hopes to do more of the same.

- A grown-up Aryeh, a rabbinical student, plays bagpipes, and came over to schmooze with Jonathan. They ended up in our basement pulling out our kilts. Scottish Jewry unite!

- Baby Ari is now on his very own mattress in our room instead of the co-sleeper (he has Xander's old one, while Xander has the new one). The salesperson at the store was so nice, he offered me a floor model mattress that usually retails at $900, for $250, with 50% off the mattress cover. And rabbinical student Ari picked it up for me in his sister's van, so we didn't even have to pay the delivery fee!

- Marc and Rachel K. visited (Marc is part of our Thursday D&D group) and we got to know them better. Both of them are educators and were amazing with Xander. They stayed for dinner, and Marc even set up the mattress with Jonathan while Rachel and I were with the boys so Xander wouldn't be upset at the upheaval of his room. Not only was it fun socializing, but the new bed has been such great incentive that Xander's gone to bed in his room with no complaining for the second night in a row!

- Today we went to a Temple Brotherhood event, "Lox and Glocks," discussing types of shooting, gun control, and the ethics of Jews and guns. It was fascinating. We took Ari with us but put Xander in "J Play," a daycare that the JCC offers for members who are in the building. Xander didn't want to leave the play area, and was very grumpy on the way out. Our plan was to go to Costco afterwards, to get gas, groceries, and lunch, but he was having none of it.
"NOOO!" he shouted. "I don't want to go to Costco."
"But we'll have pizza for lunch. And maybe even ice cream," I said. "You love pizza and ice cream more than anything else in the world."
"No, I don't!"
"Yes, you do, love. It's your biggest treat ever. I know you, my son."
"I'M NOT THE SUN! I DON'T SHINE!!"
For some reason he didn't calm down when Jonathan and I burst out laughing. We couldn't help it, it was too precious. And note if this ever happens to you: reassuring your child that yes, he shines from his heart is apparently not the right thing to say...

Oy, that's the baby on the monitor - g'night!

Age is nothing. It's all stages in life.

2011-12-09T13:05:00.000-05:00

You know, when I turned 30, it didn't really matter. I felt "older," but it didn't feel like a huge milestone.

They've been coming fast and furious this week instead.

1) For reasons long and unwieldy and wholly irrelevant to this story, the boys and I took a cab home today from Xander's school. Xander did NOT want to take a cab home, and spent a good portion of the ride crying and screaming. I spent half the ride talking to him, asking him questions about his day, and calming him down. I spent the other half of the ride talking to the cab driver. I saw how he was reacting to Xander - suppressed amusement - and I asked if he had kids. He did, he said, one daughter who lived with her mother far away. "Oy," I replied. "That must be hard." He then opened up to me utterly and completely. It was surreal. In one breath I was saying, "What color was the bike, honey? Did you go slow or fast?" and in the next breath I was pitching my voice lower and asking how the driver's ex-wife felt about him beating his drug problem. By the end of the 20-minute ride Xander had calmed down and was looking out the window, and the cab driver had shared with me his entire life story and gave me his cell phone number in case I ever needed a ride again. It was the most bizarre, unexpected pastoral visit ever, but I felt like I really made a difference to two people at once.

2) Two nights ago, Xander woke up three times in one night, crying. On the third round we finally got him to tell us what was the matter: "I woke up and my energy was gone. I was scared it wouldn't come back!" After reassuring him that his energy was sleeping, just like he should be, Jonathan and I looked at each in amazement over his kid logic. I also just sent out an email with the subject invite, "Party invite from Xander's mom," inviting some kids in his class to a small Hanukkah party at our house. When did I get old enough to have a kid who's that articulate, and to have to send out party invites with his name as my identification?

3) A friend of mine is a lactation consultant at Cincinnati Children's Hospital. She and I have been emailing back and forth because the mother of a baby in NICU is Orthodox and won't use the breast pump on Shabbat. I've been giving her advice on how to approach the woman and help her understand her perspective, sort of a "Jewish nursing in halacha" talk. The other night at HUC it was the opposite; the school hosted a "game night," and I found myself sitting on the floor building a tower out of JENGA blocks with Xander, talking to two new moms about nursing and breast pumps while going back to school. The same thing happened while schmoozing at Maura's birthday party the day after; this time it was nursing and cloth diapers at the Cheesecake Factory. How in the world did I become the experienced one about this stuff?

Whatever next week will bring, I'm up for it!

Boys and their toys (or really, kids and their toys, but the gendered version rhymes)

2011-12-06T12:41:00.000-05:00

1) My German friend Teresa, a cartoonist, is going to send us one of her children's books, about a little boy finding out what different construction equipment is used for. I'm excited. Not that I can read the German at all, but it'll be fun to make up my own dialogue to put in the word bubbles. And maybe this way Xander will feel more multi-cultural.

2) Ari and Happy Baby Colors are now best buds. He has SUCH a serious look on his face whenever I read it, and he focuses so intently. Learning colors is THE most complicated endeavor he's ever undergone, you can tell!

3) Much like sports references in the Midwest, construction references are ubiquitous in our house. Take, for example, yesterday's dinner proclamation, spoken by Xander as he put his water cup down on the table:
"Water is like a bulldozer. It pushes the food down my throat!"

4) This is more of an "adults and their toys" reference, because we wouldn't let Xander watch this with us, but - we finally saw X-Men: First Class. I loved it! I found it really touching, actually, especially the backstory for Magneto. I won't get into spoilers here, in case anyone hasn't seen it (admittedly not likely at this point), but the way they made the relationship with his mother and Judaism paramount to the use of his powers? Brilliant. I could feel my emotions being manipulated but didn't mind a bit.

5) I'm on a whole bunch of parenting email lists. One of them this week had a list of "The 5 Best Toys of All Time":

Stick
Box
String
Cardboard Tubes
Dirt

Well, I asked Jonathan to corroborate this list, because I wasn't sure about it. His response? "I have to agree that box and stick are in the top 10. I wouldn't put dirt that high up, but I guess this is a national average thing."

What do YOU think are the five best toys of all time?

My bookworm self cringes at the irony

2011-12-04T16:40:00.000-05:00

I finally convinced Xander to try my oatmeal this morning. Oatmeal, milk, brown sugar, and raisins. "I LIKE it!!" he said.

We then talked about how he had heard of oatmeal before, in the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. What they called "porridge," we call "oatmeal."

He wanted to hear the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears again.

Great, I said.

Did he want me to read the story to him, as found in our nursery tale books?

No.

Did he want me to tell him the story myself, cuddled up on my lap?

No.

Well, what did he want?

To see the story. On TV. As told by the characters in the show SuperWhy.

SuperWhy airs on PBS. It's entire point - get this - is to promote literacy.

3 year old dreams

2011-12-03T21:47:00.000-05:00

Xander and Jonathan's discussion today in the car, after someone in the next lane over had honked their horn:

"Daddy, we need to get another car."

"Really?" Jonathan responded. "Why?"

"It needs to have two horns," said Xander. "A new car with two horns."

"I see," replied Jonathan. "Where would we put them?"

"One for you in front," said Xander. "And one right HERE [the back of the passenger seat] for me!"

This is me. I'm just older, female, and have a different biological parent story.

2011-12-01T14:52:00.000-05:00

"On Children," by Kahlil Gibran

2011-11-30T16:08:00.000-05:00

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Utterly beautiful. Thank you, Sheryl, for introducing me to it. Here is a beautiful musical rendition from Sweet Honey in the Rock.

It is snowing right now.

2011-11-29T23:14:00.000-05:00

*headdesk*

HUC Klau Library annual book sale

2011-11-28T20:24:00.002-05:00

Shout-out to Rachael who picked me up at the ungodly rainy hour of 7:30am to get to the library at opening time at 8am. Thank you thank you!

So what did I get, you ask?

- An in-line Latin-English translation of Cicero's major speeches. I just used the online version of this last night when writing my thesis!
- Volumes 1 and 2 of all the major church history documents, to be used in adult eds
- A hardcover biography of Alan Greenspan, to be sent to Savta
- A 1917 edition of "Old English Songs and Hymns," with lyrics to things like the original Robin Hood song, complete with notes and explanations
- A history of Hellenistic Rome
- The Prophet by Khalil Gibran, which I've never read before

Plus a few other things. I limited myself to $20, and came away with 19 books!

How things work

2011-11-28T01:48:00.001-05:00

Today at the Children's Museum with Yasha and Eden, Xander was all about the water table and the construction zone. Every question about... everything, really... is, "How does it work?"

Even the Netflix favorites Dinosaur Train and SuperWhy have been replaced. Now it's onto Netflix documentaries and YouTube videos of excavators, car motors, fire extinguishers, you name it. Here are a few of Xander's favorites:

All About Construction on Netflix

How It's Made on the Discovery Channel, also Netflix. His favorites are bread and cheese.

(Oh yes, and Yael and I just bought new Museum memberships and split the discount - buy one get the second one at 50% - with the promise to go with each other at least once a month. It's boring to go by ourselves and just watch the kids play, and Saturdays are hectic. But if we go Sunday mornings when it opens at 11, everyone's still at church - or at the very least not there - so it only gets crowded by 1pm when we leave).

Speaking of construction, the $5 red Craigslist pick-up truck has been our best purchase ever.

Here Bunny wanted to go for a ride.

Next up was Ari. Danyul's making sure he doesn't tip over.

Jonathan is showing Xander "how sewing surgery works" by fixing Dragon's toe, which came unraveled. And as everyone knows, true surgery can only be performed while wearing a space hat.

And this has nothing to do with anything, but it's a cute picture, so here it is. Me on date night. The outfit was completed with a black slit pencil skirt and knee-high boots. :)

Thanksgiving

2011-11-25T01:16:00.000-05:00

Thankful for husbands: felt supported, cherished, loved. Not many people would follow their spouse around the world, then around the United States, for schooling. And then be willing to do it all over again to follow a job.

Thankful for children: played, hugged, cuddled. Only put on one time-out.

Thankful for family: lovely dinner with Natasha and Kevin and Kevin's mom, sister, and brother-in-law. Not to mention the four dogs.

Thankful for food: Sweet potatoes. Turkey. Stuffing. Corn. Salad. Garlic potatoes and gravy. Mac and cheese. Homemade bread. Three types of pies. Man, Natasha can cook.

Thankful for technology which lets me connect: Skype with my mom and sister, phone convos with Holly and Lois.

Thankful for kitty cats: Simcha is a 15-pound vibrating machine of purr.

Thankful for all of you, dear readers. I hope you had as wonderful a day as I did.

Five items of interest, and their accompanying emotions

2011-11-23T00:50:00.000-05:00

1) I turned in my first chapter of my thesis to my advisor today. This = hooray!

2) I spent a few hours at work going through original documents regarding the 1935 Jewish boycott of the Berlin Olympics. The material was all on onion-skin paper and included original sermons, a recording of Stephen S. Wise talking about it, and a timeline from the Canadian Jewish Congress. This = fascinating.

3) Xander surprises me sometimes by how adult he sounds. Take this morning, driving him to school:

Ari: "aaaaaAAAaaaaa" squeak "aaaaaaAAAaaaa"
Jonathan: "Thank you for sharing your feelings, Ari. I'm so glad you and Sophie [the giraffe teething squeak toy] have so much to say.
Ari: [continues to babble contentedly]
Michal: "Xander, would you like to share your feelings?"
Xander: "No. I'll keep them to myself."

This = cute.

4) Last night Jonathan and I went over all the congregations to which I'm applying with a fine-tooth comb. Today I officially submitted my form to the CCAR detailing where to send my resume. This = a relief + anxiety-provoking all at the same time. Now it's a waiting game to see where/if I get interviews.

5) We bought massive amounts of ice cream. This = my way of coping with the above.

Swingin' in the rain

2011-11-20T17:31:00.000-05:00

Xander actually turned down going to the Children's Museum today. He preferred to go for a long walk in our neighborhood. In the rain. Do I get brownie points in some mom club for going?

These were taken yesterday with Rachael's phone. Ari's first time in a swing.

So that you can see what Ari was staring at. :)

I am such an unbelievable geek

2011-11-17T17:30:00.001-05:00

The part of my thesis that I'm writing on right now is on the legal ramifications of Exodus 22:17. I followed an article's footnotes to discover a possible legal parallel to the Code of Hammurabi, which I thought was exciting. Even more exciting was that I found the exact source listed, in The Law Collections from Mesopotamia and Asia Minor. Even more exciting than that: there's a free download of the book online!!

Chaos theory. AKA things bouncing about in my head.

2011-11-15T15:02:00.002-05:00

- Xander told a story yesterday that cracked me and Jonathan up. He held up a plush toy and said, “This is the red dinosaur. He’s very scary. When people come close he says RAWWRR and they say, 'ahh, it’s a dinosaur’ and they run away.” But when he said RAWWRR he did it in a deep voice, and for the “ahh, it’s a dinosaur,” he did it in falsetto. I only wish we had had the video camera.

- The show "Thirtysomething" hit too close to home, so I've moved onto "Parenthood." Those characters are not me now, but in five years - so it's still relevant, but not as painful to watch.

- We went to the Cincinnati Museum "Holiday Junction" to see all the trains with my friend Nicole S. and her kids. Xander thought all the trees were pretty, which amused me. They were pretty. But he had no idea they were Christmas trees. Another thing he didn't notice, that I did, was the hard-core Christmas music. It's one thing to have a "holiday junction" that's all about Christmas (Hanukkah or Kwanzaa anyone?) but at least only have songs about the non-religious Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, or Frosty the Snowman. I'm not a fan of loud "Christ will be reborn" lyrics piped in over the loudspeakers at public, city-run venues. I will say that lunch was awesome though - Xander will eat any sandwich that comes out of the below Tupperware container. Sometimes the best finds are in the $1 Target bin.

It fits the shape of a standard bread slice perfectly.

- I'm on page three of my thesis. And I have an outline for the rest of the chapter. I found it really hard to start, so I feel like I’m making progress. A grad student friend, Matt, took me on a tour of the University of Cincinnati campus and came with me to their Classics Library, so I was able to get a ton more books.

- Baby Bird Saga continues: Jonathan bought a pack of white balloons, blew one up, and put it in Xander’s room when he was sleeping. Xander is now convinced that Baby Bird Egg hatched overnight. It's adorable.

- Sleep still eludes me, because Ari is STILL teething. There are numerous white bumps on his gums, but no actual teeth as of yet. With Xander it was so much better after that first tooth broke through; I’m hoping it will be the same with his brother.

- This Sunday a home-birth-network friend hosted an Arbonne make-up party. A make-up artist put seven different products on my face, and I looked... nice. Polished. Professional. But not "worth the $300 I would need to spend on their products to replicate it"-type professional. So suggestions: I know I need to at least buy a tube of lipstick and mascara for placement interviews. What else do I need? My husband says I look beautiful as is, which is wonderful but not particularly helpful. People who read this: what make-up items should I buy, and are there any brands you recommend?

Ari in autumn, alliterated

2011-11-13T21:44:00.000-05:00

Behold Ari:

Behold autumn:

(We had three loads of leaves before we were done)

Behold restful relaxation after raking:

Autumn

2011-11-10T18:43:00.000-05:00

Pretty trees in our backyard.

Cold = snuggling.

The saga of Baby Bird Balloon

2011-11-09T16:43:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time, Xander went to Yasha's birthday party. At that party, there was a goody bag. In that goody bag, there was a white balloon.

When Xander got home, Mommy blew up the white balloon. It became big and round and full of air. When Daddy took the end of the balloon and moved it in and out, it squeaked. Xander said it sounded like a baby bird.

White Balloon therefore became Baby Bird Balloon.

Baby Bird Balloon squeaked and squeaked. He asked to fly. We let go of Baby Bird Balloon and whoosh! Baby Bird Balloon flew all over the room. Xander loved Baby Bird Balloon flying. He flew, was blown up with air again, and flew again. We did this many, many times. Many. Many. Times.

Then Xander encouraged Mommy to blow up Baby Bird Balloon even bigger. "Bigger, Mommy, bigger! Make him a Big Squeaky Bird!"

Mommy blew up Baby Bird so much that he popped. Baby Bird Balloon became Baby Bird Burst Balloon Bits.

Xander cried.

Mommy said she couldn't fix Baby Bird Balloon. But she rolled all the bits together and together and over and over in themselves, until Baby Bird Balloon was a thimble-size bundle of latex.

Baby Bird Balloon thus became Baby Bird Egg.

Baby Bird Egg slept with Xander last night. Baby Bird Egg had breakfast with Xander this morning. Baby Bird Egg, according to Xander, will hatch soon.

How, you ask?

If and when you figure it out, please let me know.

What a difference an election cycle makes

2011-11-08T19:27:00.000-05:00

Xander voting for Obama

Xander voting today

Instructions for how to have a fun weekend

2011-11-06T22:48:00.001-05:00

- Give an invitation to Devin, Xander's classmate, to come over to play. When his mother prompts him to say goodbye after dinner, he shouts, "Bye Xander! Bye Xander's Mommy! Bye Xander's Daddy! Bye kitties!"

- Have the doctor tell us that Ari is in the 90th percentile for height and 50th for weight. Realize that Xander's recent growth spurt has been up but not out: he's now only in the 18th percentile for weight. Laugh uproariously later as he eats his own mass in macaroni and cheese for dinner.

- Be sleep-deprived last night due to teething crises, but give out mental Best Husband award as Jonathan takes both boys until 11am this morning.

- Edit two of my sister's English papers. Be utterly grateful that my days of mandatory compare/contrast are over.

- Go to Yasha's birthday party at Totter's Ottersville. OD on pizza and cupcakes, and try not to giggle as Xander asks the event coordinator on the train ride to "please get out. That's Daddy's seat."

- Rake leaves. Mow lawn. Blow leaves. All as a family, with everyone pitching in. Xander "helps" by blowing with his bubble blower, but then really does help significantly by raking piles of leaves. Ari coos in the wrap and then tries to smush leaves with his fingers.

- Praise every deity ever invented as children all fall asleep by 8:30pm due to Daylight Savings time, and their bodies thinking it was an hour later. Jonathan and I watch a WHOLE movie with no interruptions. It's a miracle!

Xander-isms, part umpteenth

2011-11-04T23:51:00.001-04:00

Me: I had a very frustrating day. I looked for some books in the library and I couldn't find them.
X: Did you need a flashlight?

J: How old are you?
X: I'm three!
J: Do you know how old I am? I'm forty-one.
X: WOW!!! That's a whole LOT!

Waiting at the pediatrician's office for the 3 year old/6 month well checkups, X and I play ring around the rosy. We do it so many times I get dizzy. I say, "Do we have to fall down?" X says, very perplexed, "Yes, we fall down. It's ring around the rosy. We HAVE to fall down!" Then he stares at me. Like, duh... that's the whole point of the song.

Overheard, X to A: "Fire trucks are not for eating!"

J gives X a kiss on his cheek.
X gives J a kiss on his cheek back, with dripping pizza slice in hand. J's cheek is very wet and has a red smear.
J looks at X askew as he wipes his face.
X laughs and says, "I gave you a sauce kiss!"

And a sad little voicemail message, not from or about Xander, but relating to Ari's teething and proving that I need more sleep. From Holly to me:

"Hi, Michal? You left a message on my phone for the gas company, saying you needed to reschedule your Friday appointment. Um, just so you know, you obviously didn't reach the gas company. You might want to call them again."

Sigh. Yeah. Don't really have much to say about that one.

How to play firefighter, by Xander

2011-11-03T17:21:00.002-04:00

Give a visiting friend, in this case Aaron, the special red fire hat.

Tell him, "You squeeze the fire extinguisher while I talk to everybody."

Yell as loud as you can into the bullhorn, "GET OUT OF THE HOUSE, THERE'S A FIRE!!!" while your friend makes "psshhhh" noises while working the fire extinguisher, and your little brother looks up all confused and intimidated by the sudden noise.

Have Mommy help rescue people on the second floor of your house using the fire truck ladder. Don't forget to have everybody still make "pssshhh" noises!

Be serious at the end, and wonder why the grown-ups are laughing. You did a great job, you put out the fires and saved the world!

(Additional useful information: fire-fighting should also consist of running in circles around the house multiple times putting out imaginary fires in every room. Lastly, ignore Mommy, Daddy and Aaron talking about rabbinic placement, and tune out Mommy telling Daddy all about the class she co-taught on "Death and the Afterlife" as part of an interfaith panel for adult learners. Who cares that the Protestant representative turned out to be Dennis, her mentor from CPE two summers ago? Man, grown-ups can be boring!)

Halloween!

2011-11-02T23:45:00.000-04:00

Eden as Bob the Builder and Yasha and Xander as firefighters.

Moms and boys posing in front of the haunted house on our block, while the dads took pictures.

Spooky scary neighbors!

Back at the house with our LOOT. The first priority was separating out peanut and non-peanut candy. Oh no, Mommy's forced to eat all the Snickers and Reese's Pieces.

Ari the monkey chillin' on the couch.

Trying a Twizzler for the very first time. It was a bonafide hit.

Lollipops require intense focus.

Ari, de-monkey-fied, wants candy too.

Post-candy calm-down time was spent watching YouTube videos of how to use a fire extinguisher. It all ended at 9:30pm, which really wasn't bad for all the sugar Xander consumed. He was so taken with his costume that he insisted on wearing his "fire jacket" to bed over his pajamas. We said okay... but that the fire hat, bullhorn, and fire extinguisher had to sleep by themselves in the toy bin. Oh what cruel parents! We also just barely convinced him that a firefighter costume was not the outfit to wear to school pictures the next day. I don't know if he'll ever forgive us.

Pilots, trombones, and bling. Life is good.

2011-10-31T15:57:00.004-04:00

This was the plane ride back to Cincinnati... forgot to download it from the camera.

The pilot helping him with the chair lever.

Ari "reading" a magazine. Once we finish one, he gets to play with it and crumple all the pages.

Now for a glimpse into our lazy Shabbat mornings:

I hesitate to put this online, but hopefully you'll focus on the cute kids and not on the fact that I hadn't yet brushed my hair that day.

Pajama playtime! The blue dinosaur is romping about around the castle.

Dancing with necklace decorations and frog boots.

I like this series because of Ari's movements. Watch him creep closer and closer to the shiny necklaces!

"Oooh, that looks interesting."

"I think I want to try."

"I'm getting there, I'm working it..."

"And... almost!"

The next picture, had we taken it, would have been of Ari grabbing the necklaces and Xander complaining.

In his new high chair and utterly thrilled about it.

Doing a high-chair dance.

Pleased as punch to be at the table with us.

Let me close by sharing with you a new song we use when washing our hands, courtesy of Xander. (I love that he teaches me songs he learned in school.)

To the tune of "Frere Jacques":

Top and bottom,
top and bottom,
in-between,
in-between.
Rub them both together,
rub them both together.
You are clean,
you are clean.

Making connections

2011-10-30T23:33:00.000-04:00

It's fascinating to realize how Xander's brain works.

- When listening to the song about Victor Vito and Freddie eating spaghetti, tabasco sauce, and other foods (here are the lyrics), he always says, very confusedly: "But they didn't say the Hamotzi!" I think he thinks the whole world is Jewish.

- Lunch today was pizza slices, baby carrots, and a banana. Near the end of the meal I asked him what he wanted more of: pizza, carrots, or banana? "Pizza!" he says. "The carrots and banana are already mixing in my tummy. My tummy's like a dryer!" I laughed and told him I loved his imagery, that I could picture exactly how all the food was tumbling about.

- Yesterday we were lucky enough to go to Disney on Ice: Minnie and Mickey's Magical Journey, in box seats. The parents of one of Xander's friends from school invited us to go with them. Not only was the view stupendous, but there was a private bathroom, couches, the whole works. Xander's favorite part? The sliding door between the room and the outside seating. In all fairness, we honestly don't watch any Disney movies besides The Lion King, so he didn't really know the stories. Aside from the door, he liked when Peter Pan and the three kids "flew" in the air. (I was impressed by how high they got in their harnesses, and how easily they were able to land and skate.)

- After Disney on Ice we went to lunch. Xander was hungry and tired, which translated to crankiness. One minute after pulling Ari's toy out of his hands for no apparent reason, he was deeply offended when the waitress deigned to say hi to Ari and tell him how cute he was: "DON'T TALK TO MY BROTHER!" Apparently the protective "no one can beat him up but me" thing has started already.

- Today on the way back from Rachel D.'s house, I made a wrong turn and turned around to get back on the proper street. Xander asked what had happened.

"I made a U-turn," I said, "a big circle."
"Why did you make a U-turn?" he asked.
"Because I made a wrong turn originally. I had to get back on the right street," I explained.
"Why did you make a wrong turn?" he persisted.
"I didn't mean to. It was a mistake."

And then the part I love...

"You should throw it in the water."
"What??"
"You should throw it in the water. The mistake," he clarified.

And I got it - he was paying much closer attention to taschlich last month than I had thought! Pretty good memory, too.

And so that this won't be all about Xander... Friday was a really cool day because I got full back access to the AJA. Though I've been processing collections, whenever I've wanted to access something, I've always filled out a form, given it to an archivist, and then they pulled my material from the back. Friday I learned how to do that myself! So for at least the in-house work (not my private research), I feel like a full-fledged (albeit junior junior junior) member of the team, complete with a keycard that gets me into "AJA Staff" restricted areas. :)

Interview with Xander, three years old

2011-10-28T13:17:00.000-04:00

What do you want to be when you grow up?
A fire fighter, to be on a fire truck as big as this (reaches way up). Like this one (grabs his toy fire truck, pulls the ladder all the way out).

What is your favorite color?
Pink. Look! I put pink letters on my paper (on the wall), from Amber’s class.

How do you make bread?
You put raisins in when you make challah.

Where do babies come from?
Your belly. When I was a baby, I was in your uterus for a long long long time. When your belly was getting small, I came out into the water and you picked me up and then you started to cry. When you picked me up, I was very happy. That’s why I became a baby, I was very nice. I couldn’t walk and talk and cut, I couldn’t do those things, I just cried. I was a baby just like Ari.

What would you do with $100?
I don’t know. Look, flowers! And a butterfly! It’s mine, it’s pink. (looking at art on wall)

If you could go anywhere in the world to visit, where would you go?
Cincinnati.

What is one new thing you would like to try this year?
Driving a tractor!

What is one memory you have from this year?
Leaves turning colors. I want to see the pumpkins! (on the table) They were mine from the farm, from the hayride. This one’s big and this one’s small.

If you could have only one present this year what would it be?
A cheetah.

What is your favorite food?
French toast.

What is your favorite toy?
My fire trucks.

What is your favorite thing to do?
[Play] fire trucks.

Conducted 10/22/11

Sticking to my values

2011-10-27T00:10:00.003-04:00

I just got a funny, witty, adorable email from a Christian home-birther friend of mine asking me (and everyone else on the email list) to help with fundraising and buy her son's Cub Scout popcorn.

I debated for a long time before hitting "reply all" and sending this response:

Hi ----,

First, thank you so much for including me in this email! I appreciate that you thought of me. I do like popcorn, and I do want to support your kids.

BUT... the Boy Scouts have been vehement in their exclusion of gay scouts and leaders, even kicking them out once they come out, and going to the Supreme Court to uphold their decisions. I can't in good conscience support any organization that is so strongly in opposition to my core values of tolerance and diversity.

I'm sorry that means I can't buy from your sons. But when Girl Scout cookie time comes around, count me in. :)

B'shalom (in peace),

Michal

The whole thing seems so frustrating. I like my friend, and I honestly do want to help her kids. And I think that Boy Scouting has some really great things going for it. But that 2000 Supreme Court decision really got to me.

I'd write more on a tirade, but this blog says it better than I could. Go read!

The last of the vacation photos

2011-10-26T21:39:00.000-04:00

This was actually from before we left, when Ari was feeling adventurous and kept wanting what was on my plate. Hence, banana eating. He's had it a few times since and so far, is a fan of smushing, but not so much the putting-it-in-his-mouth part.

On both Delta flights, we asked the flight attendants if Xander could visit the pilots. He was a little intimidated I think, but really liked it nonetheless. On the way to CA, one of the pilots actually vacated his chair so Xander could sit there. Plus he let him flip a couple switches. Xander was in heaven.

For broader context.

Ari, Mike, and Lois with our sumptuous dessert spread from Katella Bakery.

Antonio, Marleena with Kara (2 months old), and me in front of Marleena's new house

Ari and Kara having parallel play. Kind of. Ari is too fascinated with Antonio (note his elf shoes) to pay too much attention to anything else.

Bubbies exude comfiness and sleepiness. It's in their job description.

Ari having fun with Kathleen.

Smiley smiley boy.

Mom got Xander a recumbent car for walks around the neighborhood. It was a major hit.

He was fast on that car, I tell you. He kept racing ahead and then getting impatient when we strolled along more slowly.

Come on already!!!

I guess if our kids have attitude, we have no one to blame but ourselves!

Pictures from my mom's open house

2011-10-25T22:59:00.000-04:00

A very small selection of pictures.

Barbara and Cristina. They've been together for what, almost 30 years? Barbara's as old as my grandmother. Their longevity gives me hope in this thrice-divorced world.

Ari with Melissa.

Roxanne and Xander. She taught him that haircuts aren't scary, but can be okay and not hurt... a lesson which he then imparted to his stuffed dinosaur Buddy, who imparted it to me.

Annie tickling Ari's feet while Jonathan and Melissa look on.

We're having a crazy time here, Mommy!

Sandra making Xander's day.

And finally, brothers sharing the kid chair. I love their facial expressions!

Also, for those who are curious, Ari was SO MUCH better today. He didn't cry once, and Jonathan really enjoyed himself. This is gonna work out!

A tale that has existed (with different nuances) since women first started working outside the home

2011-10-25T00:00:00.000-04:00

So today was a great day in one sense, not-so-great in another. I went back to school/work for the first time in a month, really, acharai hachagim (after the Jewish holiday season). Class til 11am, then work til 4pm.

1) School was great. We had a guest speaker from the CCAR, Central Conference of American Rabbis, the rabbinic organization of the Reform movement and what we automatically join we're ordained. The speaker spoke all about transition, for both ourselves and our congregations. I highly recommend this spoken poem "The Parable of the Trapeze," which she played for us and, entirely not-coincidentally, happens to mirror a lot of what I'm currently feeling.

2) Work was great. I'm processing this collection by a man who was a Jewish educator for 60 years, and the variety of personal items, curriculum, and correspondence is very impressive, and inspiring. I feel lucky to be working with these documents.

BUT...

Our childcare provider who had been living with us moved out - she needed more time to work on her studies - so that meant Jonathan had Ari at home all day. Which meant we had to wake up extra early to take Xander to preschool so I could go to class, instead of me carpooling into school with her. More importantly, it meant I also needed to pump all day.

1) That didn't work so well. My body hates the pump. I got some good tips from a couple friends and it's going better, but it's still not ideal.

2) Ari hates not being around me. He only took one 20-minute nap and spent all afternoon crying. Which made Jonathan feel absolutely terrible because Ari's a really wonderful baby who rarely cries. And Ari was so mad at me when Jonathan picked me up that he refused to make eye contact for a good 15 minutes, he kept turning his head away. After that he got over it and didn't want to be out of my arms.

Xander had a perfect report card from school, so of course he was a terror at home (two-time outs for kicking the cats). And then we did bedtime rituals, and as Jonathan read Xander the last story I went into the other room to put Ari to bed, around 8:15pm. I fell completely asleep on the bed next to him.

Jonathan woke me a little after 9pm because Xander wouldn't go to sleep without me; in fact, the minute I woke up I heard hysterical "I WANT MOMMY!!!!" screams coming from his room. So I went in, lay on his bed to cuddle with him for a minute, and promptly fell asleep again. I woke up at 10:30pm when he sneezed on me. I debated going to my own bed then, but no, I wanted some time to myself. And anyway, I have to pump to keep my supply up for both myself and the woman I'm giving milk to. So to amuse myself while pumping I turned on Netflix.

Did you know that Netflix now carries Thirtysomething?

Literally six minutes into the show Jonathan came rushing downstairs confused because he heard the baby crying.

It was the seven month-old baby on the TV who was crying, not Ari. And the mom was crying into the dad's arms because she couldn't take being with the baby all day, but she didn't want to go back to work yet either.

That show is our lives. It's kind of scary.

And reassuring too, because it shows me that there really is nothing new under the sun, and all this too shall pass.

Only that shall happen

Which has happened,

Only that occur

Which has occurred;

There is nothing new

Beneath the sun!

- Ecclesiastes 1:9

The Magic Kingdom

2011-10-23T15:59:00.000-04:00

In the interest of full disclosure, I actually did NOT want to go to Disneyland this trip. Too many people, too young kids, blah blah blah. Jonathan convinced me it would be worth it though, and lo and behold, we all had a great time. Xander's jaw about dropped to the floor in the Tiki Room, and he didn't really close it until we left.

On Main Street.

After a ridiculously expensive meal, finishing lunch with home-brought strawberries.

Clinging on tightly during the Jungle Cruise.

"The train, the train, the train, the train! Would you, could you, on a train?"

Looking very carefully at... something. I forget what.

In front of the Fantasyland castle, like any good tourists.

We must pause for a short interlude of Ari being adorable:

And back to our regularly scheduled programming...

This is, honestly, how we spent most of our day. Ah, waiting.

Nearing the front of the line!

Hypnotized by Dumbo.

Entranced, yet a little trepidatious. It is a flying elephant, after all.

Of course he fell asleep right as we were about to get on.

Xander made that elephant fly so high, up and down, up and down, my stomach jumped and Ari woke up!

Post ice-cream eating, pre-ice cream clean-up.

"It's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all." Come on, you know you're all singing the tune now.

Utterly thrilled about the submarine in his immediate future. The people behind us became fast friends after half an hour of chatting.

Mesmerized.

Cool artsy shot of the submarines with the Matterhorn in the background.

Last ride of the night before closing. We went on the monorail three times for Xander's sake - to Downtown Disney and back, and then a return to Downtown Disney to leave the park.

Awesome view of Downtown.

Inside the monorail Xander exclaimed, "It's like a spaceship!"

And it will surprise no one to learn that both boys fell asleep minutes after leaving the parking structure.

Natasha and Kevin's wedding

2011-10-22T23:25:00.001-04:00

The sheer amount of pictures from our California vacation threatens to overwhelm me. To maintain my sanity, I'm going to separate them by theme, with probably four or five chunks of pictures total. The first batch is the main event, the reason that brought us to California: my sister-in-law's wedding. Note for family: yes, Jonathan has a quadrillion and a half pictures of everybody and everything. So does Kathleen. They may go up on Google docs eventually, but right now I just picked the ones with our immediate family, specifically.

Ari being held by a bridesmaid at the rehearsal dinner.

My two biggest boys by the waterfall in front of the altar.

Aunt Lois.

Pointing out the amazing fantastic fire.

Ari showing off his pout to Uncle Mike and cousin John.

John, Mike, Ari, Lois, Dorothy waiting for the ceremony to begin.

My nieces Gabriella, Marissa, and Nicole.

Jonathan walking his mother down the aisle.

Xander did NOT want to be ringbearer. He was very dubious about the whole thing. Marissa bribed him with a blue M&M in her left hand.

Following the chocolate.

More walking.

Mission accomplished.

Pretty picture of the whole wedding party. Note Xander in the background tugging Jonathan's hand.

They're married!

I liked this one, with the signs showing where all the bridesmaids are from.

Hanging out during cocktail hour.

Dorothy, Ari and Sophie the giraffe.

Getting tickled by Auntie Lois.

Three out of four siblings: Xander with Etch-n-Sketch, Kathleen, Marissa and David.

Lois and Mike looking all cute and romantic.

Me saying "cheese."

Cocktail hour lasted til past usual bedtime, so I asked a waiter to bring some bread for Xander's dinner. A fantastic fruit bowl showed up instead!

Amusing himself with the window blinds.

What the window looked out on: the bar area and gorgeous view.

Hamming it up: David, me, Marissa, Nicole, her boyfriend Tyler.

Mike, Liz, Lois.

The bride and her ring-bearer.

Xander pulling David's finger.

Oh so strong!

It was a crack-up.

Natasha and Kevin brought in a photo booth for guests to take pictures. I have our photos around here somewhere, I'll have to put them online... but here are our accouterments.

Me eating cake. Ari's long passed out.

Cake is SERIOUS BUSINESS.

Family in the wedding party.

And then a series of Xander posing for the photographer. These were taken from the side - the ones that the photographer took will obviously be much cuter! It was after this 20-minute shoot that he recommended we get Xander into modeling.

All in all, it was a wonderful day, and we were so happy to be a part of it. Next up, pictures from Disneyland.

Ah, three year-olds

2011-10-21T21:12:00.000-04:00

For dessert this evening we had strawberry cupcakes. We all loved them.

An hour later we went upstairs, and I went into the bedroom to put Ari to bed in his size 12-month (!!!) sleeper.

From the bathroom came teeth-brushing sounds, and I overheard Jonathan say this, lovingly and exasperatedly, to our eldest son:

"Xander, there IS a difference between toothpaste and frosting."

Sappiness of the day

2011-10-21T01:41:00.000-04:00

Actually, of a few days ago, but I forgot to blog it, so oh well.

At bedtime I was talking with Xander about growing up, and when he was a baby like Ari, and other things that I don't remember. And he says, very seriously, "Mommy, when you're a baby, I'll put you in the carrier and we'll take walks." "What?" I asked, confused. "You have pictures of when you were a baby, on the wall," he clarified.

And at that moment I realized two things - one, he thought life was cyclical. He saw my mother's framed pictures in the hallway of when I was young, and thought that I would go back to being a baby one day. It reminded me of myself, when I was little and saved the "1987 Cat Calendar" for when 1987 came around again. The months of the year and the days of the week always came back, so it made sense to me. I can see how it would make sense to Xander.

And two - he wanted to take care of me! Sniff.

"Mommy, I'm FLYING!!!"

2011-10-19T03:05:00.002-04:00

So saith Xanderbugs as he pulled the lever to make Dumbo fly up and down at Disneyland.

We return to Cincinnati in a couple hours, and what an amazing trip it has been. Highlights:

- Dinner with Sylvan and Deena at Lucille's Steakhouse
- Meeting with a personal trainer to find out that my knees are shot, and I literally can't do squats (thanks, Grandpa)
- Xander as ring bearer at Natasha's wedding (Jonathan was a groomsman, but Xander stole the show.)
- The photographer at the wedding telling us Xander should be a model, and wanting to be his agent
- Seeing Lois and Mike at the wedding and for lunch the day after. Or as my son corrected me when I referred to them yesterday: "Mommy, not 'Lois.' It's AUNTIE LOIS and UNCLE Mike!"
- Mike bringing over a new garbage disposal for my mom, Jonathan installing it, and then the irony that the outlet wouldn't work
- Visiting HUC Los Angeles, meeting mom's coworkers, and (no offense Sheryl) being reminded how much I love the HUC Cincinnati library
- Haircut and color with my most favorite stylist ever
- Free babysitting when I went out with Jonathan for date night
- Visiting with Holly and her family at the beach and her house (Xander's first time to the Pacific!)
- Ari learning to do a full-on army crawl
- Mom doing all my laundry
- Seeing the 60+ people that came through the house I grew up in at the open house
- In N'Out. Jamba Juice. Claim Jumper. Katella Deli. Katella BAKERY.
- Breakfast with Marleena and Antonio, and meeting Marleena's baby
- Touring my high school. Hasn't changed a bit
- Disneyland with a three year-old. Best and oddest trip I've ever taken: Tiki room, Jungle Cruise, carousel (twice), Dumbo, It's a Small World, submarine ride, the train, the monorail. I've never been before without going to Space Mountain or Star Tours. But then I've never truly enjoyed a child's wonder at experiencing singing birds either.

About 300 pictures will follow. But be warned... probably not for another week!

Post-Yom Kippur giggles

2011-10-09T15:59:00.000-04:00

Via Stephanie's FB page, Ben Stiller's opening monologue last night on Saturday Night Live. Click on the video to see - he's woozy from fasting, so who appears but Jewish Willy Wonka!

My first baby turns three tomorrow. I can't believe it!

2011-10-06T22:41:00.002-04:00

The birthday party lasted about two hours and was a whole lotta fun! We about hit our maximum amount of small people with six active kids and three babies, but Xander loved it, and that was what mattered.

The food pic is for you, Savta. :)

Cake close-up. Yep, his favorite color is pink. We support him. No haters.

Jonathan's homemade cider in the crockpot was a big hit.

Crazy crazy crazy.

Cooking feverishly.

The littles watching the bigs.

Side view.

At one point, the ball tent contained Xander (3), Yasha (3), and Eden (4 1/2) inside, Ayden (2) was in the tunnel, while Charlie (2) and Liam (2 1/2) looked on from the side. Insanity.

The adults' expressions say it all. Note Ayden halfway through the tunnel. And Simcha on top of a purse on the end table near the couch.

Hooray for Maura!

Nancy is so calm, Ari passes right out every time she holds him.

The living room held glory and wonder. You can see the top of Xander's head in the bottom right.

Cake-cutting. Xander contributed enormously to all the room decorations.

Hiya folks.

Opening presents.

Oooh, this is a great day!

Unwrapping very carefully, because the gold sticker....

Is the best part of the gift!

Max and Jack making new friends.

For those in my family: this is a child version of an adult yard tool called a leaf-blower. We have a real one because there is weather here. Xander's new one blows bubbles.

Simcha getting involved in clean-up.

We also brought in homemade strawberry cupcakes today to school.

To say that Xander was thrilled would be an understatement. Jonathan was really pleased too, because one of the teachers thought they were store-bought!

Ari's Rosh Hashanah

2011-10-05T19:42:00.001-04:00

That car ride home was exhausting!

Baker extraordinaire

2011-10-03T10:57:00.000-04:00

I'm running short on time today, so I haven't done a thorough sorting of these, and I won't put captions on. Basically: last weekend we got Xander his own little rolling pin for a dollar. Best dollar spent, EVER. Sugar cookies commenced.

Ari's on the video monitor, napping.

Mr. Cool

Morning amusement

2011-10-02T09:24:00.001-04:00

My children's full names are Alexander (Xander) and Aryeh (Ari). Both start with the letter "A."

My oldest has no concept of this. Whenever we do our alphabet puzzle, no matter what I say, "A" is for Apple only.

His name starts with "X," for Xander. And his brother's name obviously starts with "R," for R-ee.

It does make sense, I have to admit!

Home again

2011-10-01T19:55:00.003-04:00

Rosh Hashanah was... intense. Services Wednesday night, Thursday morning, and Friday night. All meals with congregants. A 3 1/2 hour drive each way. A sick and clingy Xander the whole time, culminating in a trip Friday morning to the pediatrician (who was a congregant) who diagnosed an ear infection.

Unpacking now. Then Xander's 3rd birthday party tomorrow. Back at work at the AJA on Monday. Drive back to the pulpit for Yom Kippur on Friday/Saturday.

Pictures of everything will follow... eventually.

Shana tovah!

(By the way, I don't mean for any of this to sound negative - except for Xander being sick - because I really do love it all! It's just busy.)

Happy new year!

2011-09-27T17:56:00.000-04:00

"Shana tovah u'metukah" means "[Have a] good and sweet year."

We're all off to Marion, Indiana tomorrow morning at 7:30am... wish us luck!

Note(s) to self

2011-09-26T12:31:00.000-04:00

Dear self,

Please remember these things for the future:

- Yes, you've worked out for two weeks now. But stepping on a scale every single morning is probably not helping you.

- When substitute teaching at religious school, do not wear the blouse you borrowed from a friend. Or at least, not the first time you're away from the baby without pumping for more than four hours. Exhibit A: third-graders lined up at the drinking fountain. You feel very warm. Your 15 year old teacher's aide all of sudden looks at you in utter confusion and says, "What HAPPENED?" And you realize the entire right side of your blouse is completely soaked. Having borrowed a hair dryer from the religious school educator, you then return to class... with huge milk stains all over your shirt. Sigh.

- Also remember though, in your milk mortification, that you love teaching religious school. There's no reward like the 8 year old who stated bluntly when he met you, "I hate Hebrew school, it's never fun!" and who then came up to you at the end of the day, held your hand, and said, "Wellll... the beginning of the day was boring, but the afternoon was fun."

- Your eldest son is very loving and sweet. This is sometimes unhelpful, like when he opens the door for you to come out and blinks as Simcha runs past him. Or when he feeds cookie to his little brother when your back is turned because Ari was so obviously interested. Xander's first food was avocado, and he didn't seem to be that interested in solids for a long while. Ari's first food is now sugar cookie with sprinkles. Not so surprising that now Ari really wants to eat!

- If you have a daughter, never, ever name her Rachel. On Friday I had a free facial and invited Rachel J. over (Max's mom), and it was great, really relaxing. On Saturday the new rabbinic student Rachael and her husband Danyul came over to schmooze, and Rachael is quickly becoming a good friend. Today I was supposed to get together with Rachel D., Liam and Jack's mom, for who I'm also pumping once a day, since she is having trouble nursing. Do I know no women with other names?! Although, hmm, on second thought, all these Rachels are really nice, maybe I should keep that name in mind.

- Try not to discuss service outlines with your three year-old in the room. While making Play-Doh shapes with Xander I took a call from the cantor at my High Holiday congregation. We discussed song cues and melodies that had been unclear. Hanging up five minutes later, you say to your (you thought) Play-Doh engrossed son, "I was talking about teaching Torah for Rosh Hashanah services on Wednesday!" Without missing a beat he picks up a different color Play-Doh and says, "I don't want to come. It will be boring for me." You pause, not really not knowing what to say. Unfortunately you think he's right.

- Said kids are awesome though, and you shouldn't underestimate them. Xander's home sick from school with a fever today, and Jonathan already had his day booked with appointments. You were all worried about finishing High Holy Day things with both kids in tow, but as you sit here typing (on a break from service outlines), he's sitting cutting with scissors and Ari is cooing to his blue stuffed lion in his swing.

- Try not to get addicted to kid's music. You've listened to Laurie Berkner more than any of your own music lately, and strangely you're completely okay with that.

Thomas the Train!

2011-09-22T00:02:00.002-04:00

Preparing for Thomas: engineer hat, engineer kerchief, train whistle, and frog boots.

I can't WAIT to see Thomas!

Say "cheese"!

Thomas was huge, attached to the real train at the railroad an hour north of us. The train rides went every hour, so there was about a 15 minute period every hour where it sat smoking on the track. We waited in a line worthy of Disneyland to sit on the bench in front of it and get our official picture taken.

Thomas steaming away, so you can see the full view.

The "Adventure" tent, with train tables galore. He of course had to see how the bridge worked.

Very focused on moving the Duplo.

Sharing with a new friend.

Posing in front of the screen with Percy, Thomas, and Rosie. He was thrilled.

Then it was our turn for the train ride! Xander's head is barely visible behind the family in front.

Even Ari got into the train ride.

Handing the conductor our tickets to holepunch.

The conductor was cracking up at how seriously Xander was taking everything.

Totally jazzed to be on the train.

Completely engrossed in the view outside.

Train rides are so lulling.

Jonathan and I posed. Xander couldn't be bothered, he was on a train!

After the train ride came the hay maze.

I'm a smart boy, I can find my way out!

Miniature golf came next.

Concentrating so hard, it was almost a hole in one!

So that everyone can see busy it was.

Xander loved my Thomas tattoo. Ari was a bit more dubious.

Bounce house!!

The outing ended with story time and then a pizza lunch. And, because it so special, we all went to the ice cream shop and Xander picked out his very own blue bubblegum ice cream. All in all, it was a fabulous day. I don't think Xander's ever been happier. Thank you, Savta, for making it happen!

No topic really. Just a random conglomeration of things in my head.

2011-09-20T22:41:00.005-04:00

This is the seventh day I've been working out at home. It's kind of frustrating, because the only time I have free is after the kids go to bed. So once they fall asleep, I change into workout clothes and hit the rug in the front of the TV. I'm borrowing videos from Rebecca, and so far I've done The Firm: Pump, Jump and Jab, Bob Harper: Cardio Conditioning, Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred, and Jillian Michaels' 6 Week Six-Pack. I like the latter two the best; she's more encouraging than the others when she talks to the viewer, her moves are easier, and they don't hurt my knees at all. I haven't noticed any changes yet, but I have some serious motivation: come late December I have to buy nice interview suits and bima clothing for when I go on callbacks. And I don't want to buy all this nice clothing in bigger than my pre-pregnancy size!

Very cute interaction today:

Jonathan held out his arms as wide as they could go and said, "I love you THIS much!"

Xander's eyes widened and he said, breathlessly, "That's a lot of much!"

Jonathan made CIDER. I don't know how he did it, but it involved apple juice, spices, and a crockpot. It's fantastic. You all wish you could have some.

Tired me with boy snuggles.

Does your religion determine how much money you make?

2011-09-19T16:05:00.000-04:00

I think not. But this article is fascinating nonetheless. It makes me realize how closely religion is probably related to race, socio-economic status, and cultural educational expectations.

Click to magnify.

(Shout-out to Stephanie, who found this on a table at HUC and suggested that if I blog it, she'd have her own virtual copy. :))

Planes and propellers

2011-09-17T23:13:00.000-04:00

Last Sunday was an air show at the local airport. We went with Yasha and Eden and their mom and had a wonderful time. Picture lots and lots of old planes, kids everywhere, and military personnel dressed to the nines for the 9/11 commemoration.

We stood as close to this one as we could. Ari didn't like the noise, but Xander was in love.

Jonathan and Xander went on the tour of the B-17 vintage plane.

Posing with the propeller.

A little overwhelmed with the close quarters and multiple levels of the plane.

Looking back after the tour.

It's serious plane week: last year, for Jonathan's birthday, Jeffrey and I got him a certificate for a two-hour private flight lesson. It was forgotten about for over a year, but yesterday he flew! It was gorgeous out, but really windy.

Note my hair, completely wind-blown to one side.

Pre-flight check.

Waving goodbye before take-off.

Closing up.

My artsy shot of the plane starting to taxi, taken in the door of the flight center.

Ari and I spent the hour and a half of the flight checking email and talking to Nicole L. (hi, Nicole!). Jonathan, on the other hand, did a couple touch-and-go landings in this airport and one a few suburbs up, did two high-G 180 degree-turns, a pull-up, a full stall and recovery, and basically flew it insanely crazily with the pilot's express approval.

And last but not least - today was a divide and conquer day. I went to Nicole R.'s senior sermon and service at HUC, and Jonathan and Xander went to Comic-Con Cincinnati. He did not want to go home to nap.

It's a bad picture because his face is crumpling about to cry, but I wanted a picture of him wearing his big brother shirt, given to him as a gift from the president of my last student pulpit.

Later today we schmoozed with Rachael and Danyul, and took a long walk to the park in the sunshine. And tomorrow it's off to see Thomas the Train! I love full weekends.

Xander-isms

2011-09-16T21:53:00.000-04:00

Since everyone seemed to like the post about the hamotzi, here's some more stuff Xanderbugs has said recently that cracked me up:

Me: [talking about jobs he can do as a grown-up, from firefighter to astronaut] "What do you want to do when you're a grown-up?"

X: [pausing, thinking deeply] "When I'm big, I'll grow up and blow the shofar real loud on the bima!"

Me: "I hate that, when songs get stuck in my head and I end up singing them all day. Do you ever get songs stuck in your head?"
X: "No. I take them out!"

Jonathan was making a mixed drink for himself, and Xander wondered what it was.
"It's an adult drink," Jonathan told him.
"Can I try that?" Xander asked, pointing to the rum.
Jonathan glanced my way and I shrugged my shoulders; why not? He would hate it and then not ask again. Or so we thought. His reaction?
"Mmm, this one is tasty!"

And this one's my personal favorite: we were all in the car today, driving home, when someone let one rip. It wasn't me, it wasn't Jonathan; must have been a kid. I asked Xander, "Was that you? Do you need to say excuse me?" And Xander looks at me all offended.
"It was Ari! I poop quiet!!"

Turning lemons into lemonade

2011-09-13T15:42:00.000-04:00

1) My license expired, so I had to retake the driving test for Ohio. It was so annoying, we had to drive 45 minutes away. But I scored 100%! Much better than the 74% I got when I was sixteen.

2) Jillian Michaels' DVDs are awful, terrible, fabulous workouts. I did it for 35 minutes last night and am so sore. And I'm not thin yet either. What's up with that?! But I have hope for the future.

3) On a random stop to Old Navy, Jonathan met someone he knows from the game shop. A Jewish family, who also go to our temple. We've lived here four years now, it's official that we can't go anywhere without running into people.

4) I knew that Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur were imminent, because I've been preparing for my pulpit. I also knew that this meant Xander's birthday was coming up soon (he was born on October 7th). But until Jonathan mentioned it, it hadn't occurred to me that we would need to plan a party. Oy-ness! So now we have RSVPs for five three-year olds, plus Xander, to be at our house with their parents in a couple of weekends. It will be fun, and Xander will love it. Downside: did I already say that there were going to be five three-year olds at our house?

5) The teens down the block were playing football on Sunday when a stray touchdown knocked down one of the power lines. Duke Energy had to come and fix it. What could have been annoying became an amazing adventure: Xander came with me to collect all our candles, then we very carefully placed them around the house and lit the ones in any room we were in. Xander's favorite was when Jonathan read him bedtime stories by candlelight. And Ari... he was transfixed. He just kept staring at the flame with wide eyes, completely in love with the way it shimmered.

Two year-old grace before meals

2011-09-12T19:20:00.002-04:00

"Baruch atah Adonai... look, there's a birdie!"

"Elohanu melech... it's looking for bugs, Mommy!"

"Haolam, hamotzi lechem min... IT FOUND ONE! IT'S EATING IT!"

"hamotzi lechem min haaretz. Bt'a'avon.... Look, a second birdie! It told its friend to come!"

And then the birdie conversation commenced over dinner.

Pride in one's children?

2011-09-10T23:25:00.001-04:00

The story behind this was simple. I was playing on the floor with Ari in the middle of the rug, and had my laptop scooted to the very end so I could look back to check any incoming email. During the middle of our play I went to the kitchen to get a snack... when I returned two minutes later Ari had turned himself around and scooted forward. He was mimicking my exact earlier position, and was actually typing gobbledygook! I cracked up then ran to get the camera.

This was blurry by accident, but I love how you can see his typing in motion.

And now the saga of Mr. Underwear-Head:

Giggling at his ingenuity in choice of headwear.

Doing an underwear-head dance.

Giving his brother a hug in front of the mirror.

I love the look on Ari's face in this one: what are you wearing?!

Deuteronomy 6:7 fulfilled

2011-09-09T23:45:00.000-04:00

Ari studying Torah trope with Iah, a second year rabbinical student

("And you shall teach them diligently unto your children")

Bonus pictures

2011-09-07T11:02:00.000-04:00

I had completely forgotten I had taken these on my phone.

Very proud Bubbe.

Two out of my three boys.

And no, we don't do anything for the mohawk. It's completely natural. :)

Also, from the depths of my laptop, a picture just for fun: numbers in an internet age. Click on it (even twice) to magnify.

Labels have such different nuances

2011-09-06T11:05:00.001-04:00

I've felt like I've had two kids before: childbirth helped with that, as does having both kids need something at the same time.

I've felt like a Mommy before: when Xander calls my name, or Ari reaches out to me with a plaintive look in his eyes.

I've even felt like a Mom before: when I fill out permission slips for Xander's daycare, or take either child to the doctor.

But yesterday was the first time I felt like a Mother: I found myself standing in front of the open refrigerator door at ten o'clock at night, wondering why the watermelon and cantaloupe were slowly going bad. Then it occurred to me that they were going bad because no one was eating them, because they weren't cut up into pieces in a bowl. Then I realized that I would have to be the one to cut them up. So I found myself standing barefoot in the kitchen after the kids were in bed, cutting up melons. Not only that, I was removing the watermelon seeds.

Not only did I feel like a mother... I think I just became my mother!

Watering, tractors, and brotherly love

2011-09-04T22:42:00.000-04:00

Ari and Simcha post-nap smiles

Happy to help water the lawn.

Focused on spraying.

Hi!

Brushing teeth at the end of a hard day of playing.

We visited my friend Rachel's parents' farm:

Xander liked the animals, but he loved Liam's toy tractor.

Farm dog.

Taking turns pushing each other.

Climbing up the fence to better see the cows.

And lastly, a dinner party with Mom and Nancy that saw some awesome brotherly love:

Kisses!

And then Jonathan suggested I turn on the flash, and what do you know, the pictures were clear:

Lovely laughing boys.

You notice there are no pictures of myself or Mom with the kids? Yeah, we noticed too. After she left. Sigh.

Accolades

2011-08-31T15:32:00.000-04:00

- Hooray for HUC, who sent mom to a conference in Cincinnati!

- Hooray for Mom, who's here with us!

- Hooray for Sheryl, who made a bunch of really useful research videos to help us library geeks!

- Hooray for Chana, who's moving to seminary in New York!

- Hooray for Ari, who is cutting 4 teeth at once, oy!

- Hooray for Xander, who put on his feetie pajamas all by himself, as he will so proudly tell you!

- Hooray for Jonathan, who now leads his very own game at the comic shop!

- Hooray for me, who's finally getting it together: the house is almost done, my resume's on its penultimate draft, I thought of sermon ideas for High Holidays, and I checked out some library books for my thesis!

Say it with me: Hip, hip, HUZZAH!

My very own Scheherazade

2011-08-27T22:02:00.001-04:00

Every night at bedtime, Jonathan and/or I read Xander two stories. Then it's time to hop into bed, pull the covers up, and go to sleep. But lately, instead of reading stories, Xander has been asking Jonathan to tell them. The most brilliant Arabian Nights has commenced.

The first night was an "origins" night: Xander wanted a story about Gerlal, the pink dragon, and Norbert, the baby dragon in his egg. Did you know that Gerlal was one of 12 eggs, all in different colors of the rainbow, but she was the only pink egg? And it was so scary, she got left behind when her Mommy and all her brothers and sisters fled because it turns out their dragon cave was in a volcano! Luckily all worked out in the end, because the person who rescued Gerlal knew that she was meant for a little boy, and brought her to this big room with lots of stuffed animals so that she could look for her Xander.

The next night was Norbert, who had an equally compelling story - I forget the beginning, but he ended up being rescued by a man riding a donkey-pulled cart. They drove all the way to a land called Florida, where Norbert was sitting with some of his other dragon friends when he was spotted by a Bubby, who knew immediately that Norbert in his egg was the perfect little dragon for her grandson.
We also learned about Bee (who's bigger than Ari): she was so big that she was kicked out the beehive because she was eating all the honey, but was so happy when she found her way to Xander, too.

A couple nights after that was the story of Smog, the mean dragon from The Hobbit. Next was Hubert the Dragon and the Noble Knight. Hubert is a very nice green dragon with shiny scales who was sleeping minding his own business when he woke up being poked by a knight. The knight was very scared when Hubert opened his mouth, because he thought Hubert was going to eat him, but then Hubert explained that actually he prefers a good pasta, not people, for lunch, and that he wasn't going to harm any of the villagers around him, so could the Knight please stop poking him with that little sword because it was getting annoying. The Noble Knight apologized for poking him, explaining that he hadn't realized that Hubert was a nice dragon, and that of course they could be friends from now on. So off they flew, through clouds of butterflies and lightening storms and all kinds of things, having adventures and breathing fire whenever possible.

My personal favorite (and I think Xander's too) are the stories of Teddy and Dog. Teddy is a very smart little boy whose parents happen (amazing, that) to work at NASA, where they build rockets. And (what do you know) Dog is a curious dog who always gets Teddy into trouble. A few nights ago Dog was chasing a stick around Daddy's and Mommy's workplace when he ran outside right into a rocket. And when Teddy went after him, Dog jumped all around, pressed a button accidentally, and started the launch sequence! Teddy and Dog had to strap themselves into the seats very quickly (Teddy was all strapped in when Dog barked and so Teddy had to unbuckle his own seat belt, buckle Dog, and then go back)... and bedtime. The next night they re-strapped themselves and the rocket took off with them in it! (At this point Xander made the cutest rocket launch noises ever). They went all the way past the birds, past the clouds, into space, were floating and having space adventures, then.... bedtime.

The next night, Teddy's Daddy and Mommy talked to them on the intercom and helped them land. Jonathan listed numbers one by one as the ignition sequence (8-5-2-6 etc) and his cell phone served as the rocket computer. Xander, as Teddy, punched each number into the keypad, and the phone was set to speaker so each number gave a satisfying beep!. Teddy and Dog came back down to earth, the parachute opened, the door popped off when the landed, and Teddy's Daddy and Mommy were the first among the cheering masses to give him and Dog big hugs. They all decided to go home for lunch, but then right at naptime Dog darted past the open door and went into the garage, where Teddy's Daddy had been fixing the car. Would you believe he had been adding buttons to that car to make it go super-fast? And of course Dog pressed one and OY! smoke came out of the exhaust and that car shot straight out, through the garage! "Where did it go?" Xander asked, but ahhh... bedtime.

This has been going on for over a week now, and Xander knows that if he wants to hear the end of the story tomorrow night, he has to be still and quiet and get a good night's sleep tonight.

For the past week he's gone to bed with nary a complaint, and has slept straight through til 7am.

You know you're in rabbinical school when...

2011-08-24T21:34:00.002-04:00

I wore my Gryffindor shirt to school today, and at lunchtime it sparked lots of conversation. A group of us started to discuss who would be in what house and why. Then someone said that Ron should have been in Hufflepuff, and Hermione in Ravenclaw. They were both put in Gryffindor, she reasoned, only because Harry needed sidekicks.

Then the kicker: "Exactly!" agreed someone else. "They're just like the Levites! Their position gave them assumed authority for everyone else in their house!"

The prodigal son returns

2011-08-23T15:31:00.000-04:00

Simcha showed up at the back door last night! He was dirty, smelled terrible, and lost about two pounds, but he's home. He even purred through his bath and brushing/nail-clipping session.

I still don't know where he went, or why he chose that particular moment to come back. I'm just thrilled that he's inside again. :)

Biscuits and Big Bertha

2011-08-21T22:16:00.000-04:00

Shabbat Friday evening commenced with making biscuits. Blueberry! Xander copied Jonathan's every move. Note the parallel cutting boards and biscuit dough-cutting.

The next morning was ROCKETRY!!! We are the only family I know that sees a football field and thinks that would be a great place to launch a rocket, in this case "Big Bertha." Who needs sports?!

Xander is wrapped in Jonathan's arms, holding the launch button. You can see his feet under Jonathan's knees. Ari is in the carrier as I took the video; unlike Xander, he did not like blast-off.

Rocketeers ho!!

The first and second blast-off were amazing. The third... let's just say the wind changed at an inopportune time.

It was about 30 feet up. Xander and Jonathan walked to the fire station a couple blocks away to borrow a ladder. They got a tour of the fire trucks to boot! I, on the other hand, hung out near the tree guarding our stuff and catching up with family and friends via cell phone.

My intrepid husband stood on the ladder, hauled himself up to the lower branches (15 feet above ground), and shook the tree desperately in an effort to free it. To no avail. Big Bertha was so entangled he finally had to break off the branch.

Hot, sweaty and tired after a long day of rocketry. We headed home for lunch and a well-deserved nap.

Fascinating article on education

2011-08-21T19:59:00.002-04:00

Why Are Finland's Schools So Successful? Because all of their teachers have Master's degrees, they focus on play, especially outdoors, they only start required school at seven years old, they don't care about standardized testing, and they have an unbelievable student-teacher ratio.